Last week I was looking for a photo and I ran across this picture:

I was stopped dead in my tracks.

Why?

Because in spite of showing off the change in my size from the time I wore the old shorts 8 years prior, I look sick. In fact, I look more like the pictures taken of me during and immediately following the worst medical crisis of my life. Like the one below…

Granted, it is clear that something major had happened in the 4 months between these two pictures, but it still strikes me that the picture with my “fat shorts” resembles more the sunken, hollow-eyed appearance in my “sickie” picture immediately above. Makes sense, as I probably was already suffering from the effects of the infection that would take me down.

Fast forward to last weekend, and the selfie taken below. No shadows around the eyes…Yes, my face is much fuller…I am definitely carrying more weight than I did in the other two photos.

I wonder…when Jesus looks at me now, does He lament with a “Tsk, tsk tsk…you really should be thinner, Child.”

And did He look at me at the time the first picture was taken and say with a fist pump and cheer “Thatta girl, Heidi! Way to lose weight and keep it off! I knew you could do it and, wow…check out those shorts. They look twice as big as you do now!”

The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

God in 1 Samuel 16:7

If Jesus had just 5 minutes to speak face-to-face with you or with me, do we really believe He would say, “Now then, Child, about your weight…” or “Now then, Child, about your eating.”

I don’t think so. I think He might speak to me, to you, about our hearts.

Jesus doesn’t want us thin nearly so much as He wants us His. Fully, sold-out, 100% His.

The cool thing is…I don’t typically need to choose between the two. But in the event that getting and staying thin wrecks my heart or my health…well, the choice is obvious.